I want to pray

First a prayer of profound gratitude for the people in my new church. Tonight was when the "praise band" practices. I hauled my guitar and played around with tunings. I haven't played in such a long time, and haven't had so much fun playing for an even longer time. There were a few young children running around and full of laughter. We shushed them when they got too distracting and they would shush. There were four of us playing and a patient husband and a patient mother waiting. I realize that besides the joy of making music I was experiencing patience, simplicity, and security. So I want to pray my gratitude.

I also want to pray, yet again, "I believe. Please help me with my unbelief." I'll be sixty in a few days. I am realizing that I most probably will not be alive in thirty years. None of my future years can be taken for granted. Am I ready for whatever lies beyond this life? Am I truly living my present life?

Blogging milestone

I just got this e-mail (from one of my three loyal readers) and I'm thrilled:

Cathy,

Just wanted to say congratulations to you for being the visitor to leave the 100th comment here at Got-Fruit(?)

Thank you for your support and loyal visits and comments.

God Bless you.

Christopher A. Stallworth
Got-Fruit(?)
http://got-fruit.net

Ray Stedman on unity

I so enjoy the sermons of Ray Stedman which have been available on the web for years. I refer to his exposition whenever I've studying a Bible book. Our church is going through Philippians now and what I've read today dovetails with a blog entry I stumbled across yesterday. The web has plenty of attacks on prominent Christians. Yesterday's "find" was attacking a prominent Christian for being polite to the Dalai Lama. In the past I've read sites that attack Stedman as well as every Christian author I've ever read. I wonder who these attackers think they serve?

2:1, 2 "So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any incentive of love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.

There are three strategies of the enemy we can infer from this passage. The first one is what we might call the power of negative thinking, the snare of a critical attitude toward others. Do you ever catch yourself picking someone apart flaw-by-flaw? Perhaps you salve your conscience by interjecting the phrase, "Now don't misunderstand me. I think the world of him, but..." and off we go again. What's happened? Well, we're irritated, and unconsciously seeking some justification for not seeing this person again or breaking off relationships, by pointing out all the terrible faults in him that make it necessary. The trouble with this philosophy is that we treat it as though there were no alternatives left to us. You know how this works, don't you?

Paul says that is not true. We say there is no way to reconcile our personality differences. He says that isn't true. We say there is no way we can work together on a level because our spiritual maturity is so much superior to their immaturity. Paul says that isn't true. He says there are resources in Christ which make it possible. Believe me, I know what he is talking about because I've been wrestling with this problem this very week. Paul says you have forgotten something when you think that just finding fault is an excuse to break with them. You've forgotten what you share in Christ. You've forgotten the power of the life of Christ within you to overlook injuries and forgive insults, and be patient with weakness and immaturity. There is an alternative to breaking off diplomatic relationships. You can forget it. You can forbear it, you can bear with him.

Then he says, these are the resources and the ground on which you can do this: "Is there any encouragement in Christ"; that is, is the encouragement of Christ's presence and His example anything to you? Is there any incentive of the Spirit in you to love even the unlovely? Is there any participation in the Spirit of God so that you and the other person have something in common, and you know that God is at work from his end as well as yours? Is there any affection and sympathy for problems the one who is irritating you may be undergoing? Have you looked at it from his point of view? Have you tried to put yourself in his place, and sympathized with the pressures he may be undergoing? Paul says if there is any reality in these things, then act on that basis--not with the harsh, caustic, critical, negative attitude that tears someone apart, but stop that attitude which is one of Satan's best weapons for dividing Christians. Remember these things, which are inevitably true,

Paul is going to say this again in chapter four, verse 8:

"Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."

That is not simply abstract. That has to do with a person. When you are thinking about that person, think this way about them.

current reading - Metamorpha by Kyle Strobel

I'm not sure I like his writing style and I have disliked the word "deconstruct" for years, since back in the the day when John Barth was called a "post-modern" writer. But I've been impressed with how the topics in this book speak to things that have come up in other areas of my life.

First some quoting that may be of interest to my son who is interested in "spiritual" things. I'm taking out some of the Christian references because he gets squirmy about such things.
"...' But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. But he who is spiritual appraises all things.' ... we are called to be spiritual, not in an esoteric sense, but in how we see reality. [author's emphasis] Being spiritual in this sense is coming to see the way God would have us see. Being spiritual means finding one's view of reality in the Spirit of God rather than in one's own flesh."- p.101

And then I want to exclaim to my pastor, who has been preaching about RELATIONSHIPS, that I have been reading a lot about relationships in this book . Here's what I read today:
"When the Spirit is seen through a Western worldview, he often becomes an empowering force rather than an intimate friend. Failing to see our relationship with the Spirit in relational terms (marriage. union, intimacy) will typically lead to an impersonal focus on ourselves rather than then God." - p.96

I really like the website too (although us old ladies could be grateful for less pastel font colors)

taken 2

I'm just squeezing in a little first draft writing time here.
Another time of feeling proudly charitable. In 1969, I moved in with a coworker and another guy. An apartment in a very interesting building in Staten Island (Stapleton Station). I was getting ready to quit my job and go live on a commune. Talk about foolhardy! This may have been the most romantic, foolish time of my life so it is loaded with embarrassment. My stuff: I had a Martin 12 string guitar, a trunk which had my clothes and piano music, a bottle of Joy perfume which I bought hot from a coworker, and a bear skin rug.
Other tenants: a writer who had written a story about a cat that convinced its owner that the end of the world had come, owners of a Manhattan dance studio, and an antiwar activist who was wanted by the FBI. And there was a guy, I'll call him Leo, who occassionally would burst into the apartment. He didn't live in the building, but he hung around and harassed us.
It was a time of self-conciousness about race. People like me tried to maintain at least one black friend. In the case of Leo, folks in our building were maintaining one black criminal. We would not complain about his behavior, because we were doing too much illegal activity ourselves.
I first met Leo when I was tripping on acid and going through Timothy Leary's The Psychedelic Experience: A Manual Based on the Tibetan Book of the Dead . It was sort of a guide to tripping. I had used it for tripping twice before and was "guiding" my roommates through it this time. We were sitting in the kitchen area when a very dangerous looking black guy with knife burst into the front door. He started to say threatening things and I decided to take things in hand. In my most halucinogen induced enlightened state of mind, I asked him what he needed and what could we give him. I thought I was doing pretty well when he suddenly turned my perception upside down by turning to one of my roommates and demanded to know "Who IS this chick?" Dax introduced me.

This chapter of my life requires quite a bit of description ... and courage to relate. So I'll get back to this later.

"taken"

I've done a lot of foolish things in my life. A lot. And it's God's grace that I haven't been harmed in the process. I haven't done foolish things for thrills ... I'n really too timid for thrill. The most foolish things have been done in charity. Often involved with inviting someone into my home. Even as I write this, I'm embarassed to describe how naive I have been.
I'm going to do it though. As a writing exercise. And I'll probably revise online.

I was 18. Old enough to drink, not interested in voting. My first summer after high school graduation. Like my father before me, I was a camp counselor. I rode a bus home for my mid season break. Somehow I met a sailor at the Port Authority. There's a cliche. He indicated that he needed a place to stay , and being charitable, I invited him to stay at my parent's house. My parents were out of town, leaving me alone no doubt they trusted me.
It took me a few hours to get there. We lived had to take the ... train to its end and then ride a bus from Jamaica to the city line where we lived. When we got to the house I gave him my sister's room and said good night. In the middle of the night he woke me up and told me that I was a sweet kid and that he was leaving. I feel sorry for the poor guy. He thought he was going to find sex and all he got was several hours with the New York City transit authority.

Eddie Izzard on giraffes

Half of the fun in watching this is the audience.


Here's an old one to show that Eddie's been perfecting his giraffes for years.