seventy first

Now things get hazy and it's hard to put things in order. Still, this is not history, it is "what it was like" not "what it was". My rambling is not fact-finding. When I have dementia and repeat things, will you say "you said that already"? This is not an essay test. .... moved ....

Overwhelmed at home

There is a very big jump from skilled nursing care and being alone at home. I was definitely ready to leave the nursing home and was the most independent patient there, but I'm feeling very inadequate at home alone. It's hard to find a place to begin sorting things out and hard to decide how to schedule my day. Every little thing is a big deal.

Outta Here

I'll be leaving the nursing home this Saturday afternoon!
I've been practicing walking with a walker and climbing stairs with a cane. Kind friends from church came and cleaned my apartment and have stocked my kitchen!
I don't know when I'll be online. I have to reconnect my cable connection. I'll be out of work for at least two more weeks. So much to do!!

It won't be long now

I went to the doctor yesterday and got permission to use full weight on the boot. Today I climbed and descended on 6 steps. Now I'm trying to figure out how to stay here until Saturday and then be able to leave on that day. That way my son will be available for transportation.

Two folks from church have already cleaned my apartment. So I won't have to face the rotten winter squash that was on the top of the fridge.

The hosptial is mailing me a disk with all my x rays. I'll post them as soon as I can.

I'm hoping to rent a wheelchair for work, and a walker for home. The big chore ahead is shopping for a car.

I still have not mastered the art of patience, but I certainly have had lots of instruction. Since patience is a GIFT of the Spirit I guess I'll have to have patience about receiving it.

I found a really neat selection on secular spirituality in this month's Christianity today

...readers and viewers, often young and outside the church, fashion personal spiriual systems from individual experience and elements of mythic popular culture. Seekers, then, get some answers and taste of transcendence without the moral accountability or costly interpersonal committments of church. But they also forfeit significant checks on the reasonableness of their beliefs, a worthy object of worship, authentic spiritual community, and, most importantly, any ultimately redeptive message or means.

-James Harrick "Sci-fi's Brave New World"

events

Folks of my church community are in prayer for a family that's having a hard time. There seems to be one medical emergency after another in the two generations. Yesterday the mother in the second generation was hit by a car and has suffered some serious injury.

My room telephone number has been changed ... it is now 410-341-5527. I was pretty steamed about the change, but I got over it.

Then I got steamed that my roommate had gotten into my stuff while I was out for therapy. I went to our section office and said that third time was enough for me and that I did not wish to be in her room. Because there is painting etc. going on, they couldn't move her tonight, but they will SOON. Meanwhile, my roommates' wheel chair is posted outside of the nurses's station where they can keep an eye on her.

Connie came and brought a pickle which I scarfed without even savoring it. I was too agitated. After conversation we prayed for Tracy and I felt a little more centered.

My cribbage buddy is going to the hospital for chemo this weekend, so maybe I'll read up on cribbage via Wikipoedia and impress him when he gets back.

Not pinochle

I'm learning cribbage. I was excited because I thought my dad described how my great grandmother played cribbage with my grandfather. Now that I'm on the computer, I looked up Dad's memoirs on my website and now I see that it was pinochle, not cribbage. I guess I'll learn pinochle too.
My roommate and I are in a new room down at the end of the hall. We were moved because there is wallpapering and painting going on. I think we'll have it quieter and there is a little more space.
My regular therapist is back and laid down the law. Back to doctor's orders. No walking.

to sleep, perchance to dream

I'm sleep deprived. Last night my roommate was into "riding" her bed for twenty minute stretches. By that I mean she was using the electric bed raising/lowering controls. I tried to nap yesterday afternoon and I was wakened to report on how many bowel movements I had during that shift.

But here is piece of good news: I was actually WALKING today. I had a different therapist and I told her I didn't want to hop with the walker and she asked me if I could walk woth the walker and I did! I think I'll have no trouble with the stairs, once I get rid of this boot. (picture is on the wrong leg, btw)

Waking up

A few days off oxycodone now and I'm feeling more like myself ... generally a nicer person and certainly more awake. I'm also more anxious now as I am not numbed about my have-to-buy-a-car situation and trying to figure out how mobile I will be at work (maybe I'll need a wheel chair for when I get tired in the afternoons?)
I have gotten around to plow through much of my professional e-mail and I'm thrilled to see that I was replaced (til the end of Feb) which means I'm not expendable.
I'm looking forward to RUNNING out of here. Though a few things I'll miss ... clean linens whenever I want them, getting laundry done often, three nice meals with lots of variety, sleeping til 8 and not rushing when I get up. I look forward to my steel cut oatmeal, good coffee, nobody waking me up for pills or tests, the smells of other people, my computer access, QUIET!!!, seeing kids,...
But don't think I have a clue of when I'm leaving. I'm guessing I'll be here til the middle of the month.

latest news from the nursing home

It's hard to be newsy from a nursing home. Though last week was somewhat newsier than most. I would have kept you posted but the internet was down on the library computers. My roommate sort of went crazy. She was into my stuff a few times and was ranting to invisible people much of the time ... including nights. She also kept trying to crawl down out of her wheel chair, so I was hitting the call button rather often. I was feeling less and less charitable to the point I couldn't stand myself very much.

Two things have changed. I stopped taking oxycodone and switched to the pain med I used to take at home. And my roommate was taken off an antibiotic that was making her act so weird. So I'm feeling more charitable. It's needed here because there are some very disturbed patients. Today I offered to close a lady's door and she said "I'm dressed". Evidently she thought she looked OK in a bikini. More details would be too much information even for the TMI blog.

I also have finally figured out how to get the computer to print (the trick is to use a different computer). And how to use Skype with a mike and headphones. Which I"m going to do right now to call my step mother.

The swearing in

I'm not sure how to spell inauguration. Great day for me. I went to rehab early so I could watch the inauguration on TV. I took seven steps using the parallel bars using weight on my big left toe. Then I went to my room to watch the inauguration. During Rick Warren's invocation everyone on the floor .. nurses and patients ... were silent. It was a very moving moment. Then during Obama's speech there was lots of cheering.
When I came to the computer room, I heard from a guy from Europe who I used to talk to on Skype. He's moved to England and says everybody's pleased about our new choice of president. That should be no surprise. World opinion was my own major concern in voting.
That's it for today. It's not yet three and I'm tired!

a nother world

I so admire people who faithfully visit hospitals and nursing homes. When I leave here, will I be one of those people? Today I had nice visits from Connie and Julia (who brought chocolate covered raisins and nuts.. mmm)

I'm pretty groggy these days and don't accomplish much. I did help teach people to play on the wii today, and had a nice long conversation with a lady who has dementia pretty bad, but who likes converstion. I figure I was helping the nursing staff some by keeping her occupied in one place. I truly enjoy talking with her too.

I'm crawling through Infinite Jest but pretty slowly because even though I really enjoy the book, I keep falling asleep. I fall asleep because of the pain pills. I hope the pain I'm experiencing indicates good muscle work and nothing amiss.

I'm thinking a lot of thoughts and meeting really interesting people who have really intersting situations. Wish I had the accuity to write about them.

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It's been a while. I have had a cold. More later.
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Great visits from church folks. Connie, Karin, Dave...
Also a happy face balloon to tie to my wheel chair and a nice visit from Judy who is in a neck brace and may be out from work herself soon. My coworkers declared a casual day on my behalf and took a nice collection for me!!!

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