Rant

I'm missing church yet again. I've got stomach problems again. This is the fourth day in a row and I haven't been all that well for several days before that. I'll be seeing my doctor on the twenty second.

I'm also emotionally up and down ... and mostly down.
I have the feeling that my perspective on the world has been flawed all my life. I seem to have delusions about my place in the work world ... it occurs to me that maybe the world doesn't owe me a living (Mother was right!).

I'm feeling somewhat disgusted with the field of education - whatever joy I've been getting out of it isn't what it's about.

I tried to watch a local tv show put on by our Board of Ed yesterday. I wish I could repeat the babble I heard to illustrate my disgust, but my brain just can't hold all that jargon. (I don't think the word "paradigm" was used. I'd have remembered that.) Here's a quote that has taken me a few minutes to dredge up:
"It's not a program, it's an initiative."
My non-professional response is: "WTF???"
And then the person ended her speech with the words "It's really just common sense." Which made me decide to turn off the TV in search of common sense.

bloggishness of confusion

I am socially challenged. I know too many wonderful people ... I think I collect them... and yet I do too little to nourish friendships. Same thing with relatives. They're people too. And I don't treasure my people. I declared this my year of sabbatical and I have really pulled away from my church. I actually feel a part of two churches, yet I attend neither. Oh make that four churches counting the Spanish and Korean ones. Tonight Immanuel Baptist has a meet and greet for a new pastor ... he's not officially a new pastor, but since the search committee picked him, I doubt short of a lightening strike he'll be voted down. He gives a sermon tomorrow. Meanwhile Community of Joy is renovating a new building. And the Iglesia Bautista is growing and the Korean pastor's daughter just graduated. You'd think I might show up for some of this. But day by day, I'm not up for it. ... more later. I've got to go to class.